Thursday, April 14, 2011

Do what I say not what I do

So many of you know the journey we are on with Jenna's health and the alternative route we have taken with her health. Her doctor diagnosed her with a candida overgrowth and she is currently undergoing treatment for that along with a very strict anti-candida diet. Basically, that means, no sugar, grains, starches or vinegar. AKA lean protein and veggies and some nuts.

She has really struggled with this, as you can imagine, even though it is only for ten days. Somewhere along the way she must have reasoned that starving herself or only eating a spoonful of almond butter was a good game plan. That, and sneaking bites of donuts at Papa's house or eating a granola bar under her bed. So, yesterday after realizing that she was getting very skinny, I decided to keep her home from school where I could make sure she wasn't cheating and so I could cook for her all day long and force her to eat :)

Of course explaining the reason for her absence to school seemed to be unnecessary so, as we were driving to go pick up Jared's sister I call the Blackburn Office. I tell them Jenna isn't at school today because she has a stomach ache. Promptly after hanging up Jenna says to me, "I don't have a stomach ache!"

So I explain to her that it is easier to say that then to explain about her special diet, not mention the key fact that she is starving herself which could possibly trigger a call to DFS

She then says to me. "So, you just lied?"

Silence. I cannot even think of how to explain that to her. More silence.

Then I just say, "Yea, I guess I did"

So, how is it that I can require and expect my kids to be honest all of the time, no matter what? How can I tell them that is is always better to be honest, when I don't always tell the truth?

Taking it even further, it seems to me that the things I am always getting onto them about are things I do myself. Like yelling, or whining. Or not having any patience. And let me tell you, I am the master of impatience.

So, I figure the best, although imperfect, remedy for this problem is honesty. Ironic much? Seriously though, I just try and tell my kids "You know what, mom isn't perfect. I make mistakes, I do things that are wrong sometimes, and I have a lot of flaws." I explain to them that I want them to be better than I am. I want them to be kinder, and more patient and loving. I want them to have more self control and compassion for other people. I want them to make better choices than I do.

So kids, in short, what I really am trying to say is "do what I say and not what I do!"


  1. I think the kids are gonna be fine grown ups.

  2. ugh...i don't like this one... :)

    my favorite is when my kids say "mom, you are going 50 and the speed limit says 35...." :\

  3. when we realize that its impossible to be the perfect parent. I do agree with Cruxed..your kids will grow up great..and normal..and imperfect.

  4. I don't care how heavy the subject is, that still made me laugh. Just for Jenna to catch that and then say, "so, you just lied?" hahahahaha

    btw, nice writing.